Yom Kippur
Sep. 17th, 2002 03:10 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
cellio
In the morning I felt physically fine, better than I
expected to. I felt like all the water I had drunk
at T minus 5 minutes was paying off. Alas, the feeling
did not last.
Morning service: the sermon was fantastic. I hope he publishes it on the web site. He talked about ethics and integrity in a way that really worked for me. (The only other comment I've heard thus far was negative, so you can't please everyone.) He even gave "homework": he publishes the "eilu devarim" bit from the Talmud (also part of the shacharit liturgy) in the service handout and told people to take it home and study it. Oh, and to choose three things from the list of mitzvot that you can never do enough of and work on them between now and next Yom Kippur.
I had a seat on the bimah for the morning service. Lots of people did, so chairs were in places that don't usually get chairs. I couldn't see the ark from mine (because of the curve of the room). Oops. Hearing wasn't a problem, though. Our set of seats was shorted a book, which caused problems for a few minutes until someone figured out where to get another one quietly. (Walking down off the bimah and asking someone in the first row for a book seemed tacky, though I briefly considered it.)
There is a part of the Yom Kippur liturgy where you
basically say "I forgive those who have wronged me;
let no one be judged harsely on my account". (It
then goes on to say something like "just as I forgive
them, may they forgive me...".) I've always had trouble
with unrequested forgiveness. I'm also not ready to
say that I would always grant it if asked.
I mean, if, chas v'shalom, someone were to murder
a family member in cold blood, I don't think I could
forgive him no matter how nicely he asked unless I
saw real evidence of repentance. But this year
I came a stop closer to accepting this part of the
liturgy, by realizing that at the very least I could
grant forgiveness to any Jew who might have wronged
me and who was saying these same words (i.e. was taking
the Day of Atonement seriously).
The haftarah reading for the Yom Kippur mincha (afternoon)
service is the book of Jonah. I just don't get this story.
Ok, the plain meaning is mostly straightforward: (1) don't
run away from God when he tells you to do something and
(2) repentance is possible. But deeper meanings, and any
reasonable explanation of the part at the end with the gourd,
elude me.
The Reform machzor fills the afternoon service with all sorts of readings that aren't traditional. A lot of them dwelled on the martyrs of our people, including those who died in the Shoah (Holocaust). At times I wondered if I had time-warped to a Yom Ha-Shoah service. I remember this from past years, of course, and was even one of the readers last year, but I still don't care for it. It also makes me wonder what the content of a more traditional YK mincha service is.
After mincha was a study session for adults (and something for families with younger kids). The guy who frequently dominates Shabbat-morning Torah study with long-winded, frequently-off-topic (or missing-the-point) stories was there and in his usual form, alas, but the session was otherwise interesting. My brain was getting fuzzy by then, though, so no details here.
After that was Yizkor (memorial service). I was pretty tired by then, and apparently fell asleep during what I suspect was a pretty good sermon. Oops. Yizkor always makes me feel a little strange, because I'm never sure if I should be mourning non-Jewish relatives in a Jewish way. (My compromise is that I do so for those who have died in the last several years, but not the ones whose deaths predate my Judaism.) Then it was on to Ne'ilah, the concluding prayers, which didn't move me quite as much this year as last but were still effective. And then a slow walk home and a half-hour wait for sunset.
This was not a good year, fast-wise. I'm not sure what
was different. All the preparation was ok as far as I
could tell (I ate and drank the right things at the right
times), but I was much more parched and light-headed late
in the day than I should have been. And then I made matters
worse by taking some ibuprofin to kill a nasty headache
around hour 20 of the fast. It diminished but did not
dispel the headache, and it made me queasy. Realization
after the fact: Ibuprofin isn't supposed to be taken on
an empty stomach. Oops.
Re: Mincha, etc
Date: 2002-09-17 01:54 pm (UTC)I put that poorly: what I meant was that mincha gets Torah reading, which only happens otherwise on Shabbat. The actual text read is not a usual one for Shabbat mincha (which is the first aliyah from the next week broken into thirds). Instead, it is a reading about forbidden sexual relations. I have a problem with this one, because, due to the grammar and other implications of the text, it is only addressing males. Don't know why it bothers me so much more on Yom Kippur, but it does.
Food after the fast
I bring a bunch of stuff to shul before Kol Nidre (the beginning service), including my machzor (special prayer book; I don't care for the one my shul uses), stuff for napping during the break, and a bottle of water for after. This year I brought some stuff back and forth, too. I think that the water could be viewed as something with a use on Yom Kippur, actually: I could use it to wash my hands if needed, or to quench the thirst of a child or nursing/pregnant woman (or someone else who doesn't fast). Though I agree it feels weird to carry food on yom tov for after.
My shul puts out apple juice and some low-key lightly sweet stuff (usually marble cake, this year tea biscuits) right after ma'ariv (evening service), so people can fortify themselves before heading home. I usually find that the water I bring is sufficient for me. And, strangely, the years I haven't had even that, the energy at the end of neilah has carried me through until I could eat (there was one year it was over an hour before I got to the breakfast, and I was busy chatting with people even then rather than eating. Somehow, being able to eat makes it easier for me).
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Re: Mincha, etc
Date: 2002-09-17 02:24 pm (UTC)Ah, ok. Thanks for the clarification.
We didn't read the traditional reading for either Torah service yesterday, then. I know we substituted the holines code (Lev 19) for the traditional morning reading about sacrifices. I don't remember what we read in the afternoon, which is sad given that it was only about 27 hours ago... sigh. It was something we've read recently on Shabbat; I'll have to look it up. (We followed the Reform machzor on this.)
My shul puts out apple juice and some low-key lightly sweet stuff
Ours doesn't have a place to set it out. Our social hall is full of chairs for people attending services. I suppose they could put some tables out in front of the building, but that might encourage people to linger and block the doors.
We are a large congregation -- 850+ families, which I think is about 1800-2000 people for the high holy days. The back wall of our sanctuary (which leads to a lobby) and the back wall of that lobby (which leads to the social hall) can be removed (it takes a day). So all of that space becomes one big room for HHD services, with folding chairs filling up the lobby and social hall. It's the only way we can fit everyone in for Yom Kippur day. (For everything else we've gone to double services, early/late.)
Yes, I know what that says about attendance at times other than the high holy days.... Every synagogue in town has higher attendance for the high holy days than at any other time, but the differences are not always quite as pronounced in more traditional congregations (maybe only doubling, as opposed to going up by a factor of 6 or 7). Or so I'm told; I've never gone anywhere but my own congregation for Yom Kippur. (I went elsewhere for second-day Rosh Hashana once and attendane was lower than what they said they got for the first day, but higher than what I've seen for Shabbat there.)
Um...
Date: 2002-09-17 02:29 pm (UTC)YK logistics
Date: 2002-09-17 03:19 pm (UTC)If you have an assigned seat, can you leave stuff there overnight? I suppose it's moot with services ending early (do you sound the shofar at the end of neilah?), but if it ran until the end of YK, you could bring snacks before the day started.
Every shul has larger attendance at the high holy days; I don't think I've heard of a shul that doesn't. There are some people who find only those services moving, I suppose, or feel some obligation they don't the rest of the year.
Re: YK logistics
Date: 2002-09-17 08:06 pm (UTC)I suppose I could try to leave stuff in the coat room. So long as most people weren't trying to do that, it'd probably work. But, as you said, this is really only relevant if services run through the end of the fast, and ours generally don't.
Yes, we blow the shofar at the end of neilah, even though it's not yet dark.
end of Neilah
Date: 2002-09-18 04:21 am (UTC)