it's all in how you say it
Feb. 25th, 2003 10:57 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
cellioA fellow congregant called and asked me to be on the steering committee (read: board) of the sisterhood.
What I thought: Having a sisterhood (and brotherhood) is anathema to an egalitarian congregation. If we say that men and women don't have assigned roles, why on earth would I want to help perpetrate an organization that tries to go backwards by (re-)assigning those roles? It's not like our sisterhood and brotherhood are trying to move past conventional gender roles -- the women handle babysitting during services and serve cookies and coffee afterwards, and the men hold barbeques and talks by investment bankers. Feh! I want none of it! And not just because babysitting and serving coffee aren't my thing! There's a higher principle here. How can I help you see this?
What I said: I'm flattered, but no.
What I thought: Having a sisterhood (and brotherhood) is anathema to an egalitarian congregation. If we say that men and women don't have assigned roles, why on earth would I want to help perpetrate an organization that tries to go backwards by (re-)assigning those roles? It's not like our sisterhood and brotherhood are trying to move past conventional gender roles -- the women handle babysitting during services and serve cookies and coffee afterwards, and the men hold barbeques and talks by investment bankers. Feh! I want none of it! And not just because babysitting and serving coffee aren't my thing! There's a higher principle here. How can I help you see this?
What I said: I'm flattered, but no.
(no subject)
Date: 2003-02-26 08:32 pm (UTC)Role-swapping is a great idea. I think I will whisper it in the ears of a couple people involved in these groups and see what their reactions are. This time around, at least, I think I'll try to nudge things from the sidelines, not take the board seat. (I'll bet I could get another offer next year if I like.) If nothing else, I need better intelligence about how this organization really operates. I've never even been to a meeting.
But hijacking the group is clever, and I shouldn't rule out that possibility. I've been distracted by the congregation board, where my role seems to be "friendly but persistent PITA who's going to make us at least look at this issue" (iterate over several issues). I think I'll try to gather data and see if I can nudge things from outside, and that will tell me if trying it from the inside in a year would be a better idea.
Thanks!