cellio | irritation, thy name is Volkswagen

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irritation, thy name is Volkswagen

I bought this car, new, in March. It only has about 2000 miles on it.

6:50: Return to car after a quick stop on the way home from work. Learn that pulling out of parking space is hindered by absence of power. Battery-shaped idiot light is on. Call Dani, on the theory that he's faster than AAA. [1]

7:00: Dani arrives with car and jumper cables. I have spent the previous 10 minutes trying to remove the little plastic shield that protects my battery from the elements -- or rather, that subset of elements that can slip past the hood. Dani finds magic button. Meanwhile, I discover that my binder of car manuals does have a global TOC; it's just neither first nor last in the binder.

7:10: Multiple jump attempts have failed. "Electrical system" idiot light joins the battery light. Dani goes home; I call the dealer. Their service folks have all gone home, so I call VW's "free road-side assistance".

7:15: Get to a human, who takes my information and promises to dispatch a tow truck to take the car to the dealer. How will I get home (and back in the morning)? Oh don't worry; they have loaners.

7:50: Call again and ask for an update on that tow truck. They haven't found one yet. Err, does this jeopardize arrival at the dealership before they close at 9:00? We'll get back to you.

8:15: Still no dispatch. Also discover that dealer has no loaners today in any case. Their answer is that I should go rent a car from a place some miles away. I decline and ask if it's true what the warranty says about unlimited towing. They agree to tow the car to my house tonight and the dealership tomorrow:

Me: So when can I expect that tow truck?
Them: We really have no idea.
Me: Well since you're towing it to my house, you don't really need me for that, right?
Them: ???
Me: I'm close enough to home to walk. May I go home and have you bring me my car later?
Them: Sure, just leave the keys in it.
Me: Err... (Yeah, it's dead, but still...)
Them: We need the key so we can put it in neutral for towing.
Me: It's a manual. It's in neutral now.
Them: Ok. Go home.

8:35: Voicemail signal on cell phone goes off. [2] Call them right away, but we're not giving you a number to expedite this. Get into support queue again. [3]

8:45: Get a human. No tow-truck drivers will take the call if I'm not at the car. The person who told me I could go home shouldn't have done that, so can I go back and wait without any information about how long it will take? I counter-propose that the driver swing by my house on the way; they agree. They will call back in a few minutes with an update. (Meanwhile, I'm wondering what I can safely do about dinner.)

9:00: They found a driver who can be there in three hours. !!! They say they'll keep looking in the meantime.

9:15: The midnight guy withdrew, and no one else will take it. WTF? There's a game downtown. So? On game nights the police have a lot of DUI stops, with resulting cars that need to be towed to the impound lot. Police trump regular people. Thus, the tow trucks are all busy.

Ok, I said, can I make an appointment for a tow first thing in the morning? No, but I can call in the morning and take my chances. I mention that it will become an illegally-parked car at 8AM [4] so it needs to be before then; they say this is a problem because most of these businesses open at 8 or 9. (Pause) Ok, here's a 24-hour one. You can't make an appointment, but it usually takes about an hour so you should call us between 6:30 and 7. Oh joy. Oh rapture.

So I get to deal with this bright and early tomorrow, on the Friday before a holiday weekend, when (I'm betting) they won't be able to actually fix the power train (or whatever has failed) the same day, so they'll have to give me a loaner until Tuesday. But I might have to do lots of extra running around if they still have no loaners, on a day already constrained somewhat by Shabbat.

Grumble. I can't shake the feeling that -- game or no -- I should have gotten much better service. Everyone I talked with was very friendly (as was I in dealing with them), but their ability to actually deliver was lacking.

By the way, AAA implements VW's roadside assistance, so no, there was no point in calling them for a tow. It's the same pool of drivers.

[1] As the later narrative reveals, I did nothing to drain the battery. In fact, you have to work really hard to do that, what with all the noise the car makes if you leave the lights on after stopping the engine, not that I had the headlights on in broad daylight anyway.

[2] The phone didn't ring, though it has done so before and since. Remember to consult phone's attempt at documentation to find out wy.

[3] Aside to the guys who recorded the "thank you for holding" messages: you keep using that word "momentarily"; I don't think it means what you think it means.

[4] This is technically true but really a bit of a white lie: that's when enforcement begins on the two-hour parking meter. Not that I'm going to tell them they've got until 10, mind; I do have to be at work tomorrow. And I'm sure as hell not going to walk to my car before 8 and begin feeding quarters into the meter for, potentially, two hours.

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There is a reason I regard some aspects of my life as drudgery. I am the one of the two of us who deals with things that require arguing with artificial phone systems and time spent on hold. And the problem doesn't get solved even when (inevitably a guy who is ESL and hard to understand, no offense intended) shows up. AAA is actually the best of the lot, so far. But my need for them has been mercifully scant, and not on a game night.

When the Mazda didn't accept its key, I did walk home to call S_C, but it was icky. No shoulder, big trucks, and poison ivy. Would've been easier with a map. It was a steering lock thing, and Since it's not My Car (which got killed in a snowstorm), its peculiarities are unfamiliar. I did tell the merchants that we would get it out of their lot as quickly as possible. I just forgot that the steering on his thing does lock, and requires odd manipulation to turn the key. I want my '66 VW bug again.

Being stuck in a parking lot with an unresponsive New Car is not fun.

I showed this to my wife,

gf_guruilla. Here's what she had to say:

Mmmm... we've been down *this* road before. No fun. Well, here goes.

First, call your local AAA office, and let them know that VW is giving you the run-around. They'll appreciate the "heads-up".

FWIW, most DUI arrests (at least in my town) happen after the game is *over* - if you called before gametime and they couldn't get you moved before the game started (let alone was over), they were feeding you a line of meadow muffins. Now, ont the gritty...

Dealer service departments generally open at 7 a.m. Fortify yourself with beverage of choice before you start (mine is coffee, hot, strong, light and sweet). Put on your best "don't screw with me, bozo" attitude (you know, the one you use when the SME treats you like an imbecilic child...) Call the service department of the dealer from whence you bought the car *when they open*. Ask for the service *manager*. If he is unavailable, you need to talk to the owner of the dealership, NOW. Explain that you chose their vehicle for its technical strong points (eg, reliability and durability). So far, neither their vehicle nor their service has lived up to its reputation. Reiterate that you did *not* like being stranded, after dark, whilst driving a car so new it hasn't even had its first oil change... Now, ask what they are going to do, right now, to fix the problem. Let the dealer arrange the tow, and get you a loaner, and/or transport you to the rental car office (and put the rental on *their* account - don't let them "reimburse you" - they pay up front.)

Explain that you followed *their* procedures last night, and got stranded...The fact that they could not get a tow truck to you for more than 4 hours after your *new* car broke down in a large city left you wondering about the advisability of driving this new beast *anywhere* - except maybe back to their lot to return it. Check what your contract says about roadside assistance - most of them have a time limit (e.g. "within 2 hours") written in. If so, mention breach of contract, lawyers, yada-yada-yada.

Play smart, play *nasty*. Mention that you don't like people who cannot deliver on their contracts.

If all else fails, you have the perfect opportunity for revenge and getting your car fixed, pronto, and maybe a few free items thrown in, to boot. Get dressed in your best off-to-business clothing, along with a few well-chosen accessories. You want to look *rich*. Sunday afternoon, about 2 p.m., head into the showroom, and start lovingly caressing the most "desirable", expensive car there, with the look on your face of "gotta have it". When the salesman comes to ask if he can help you, your revenge is about to become complete. Answer him, in a voice loud enough to be heard over a jet engine, that he can help you get your "brand new" vehicle fixed and returned to you, because while he can sell 'em, nobody seems to be able to sell you a VW that *works*. and doesn't leave you stranded, alone, after dark. Showroom will empty in a flash, and you, my dear, end up calling the shots...

I'll add that calling AAA might not have been a bad idea, even if the same company was providing VW service. They might be more eager to please AAA than VW, as AAA likely provides them more service.

P.S.: I hope you liked the questions.

Thanks to both of you.

Apparently (I learned from the driver), part of the game problem was not so much the DUIs but that at the last minute they moved the start time of the game earlier, and there was some extra towing due to that -- people parked in places that became illegal earlier than usual due to the game. That ought to make for some interesting complaints to city council et al. :-) (The game started at 6.)

My contact (which I re-read while waiting for the tow that never came last night) does not in fact make any promises about service times. I have not yet investigated PA's lemon laws to see if they apply.

Oh, and I did make sure the rental is on their tab, not mine. At least something went right. I signed nothing that could be interpreted as "I'll pay you (Enterprise) if VW fails to pay".

Your revenge scenario made me smile. Alas, PA's blue laws forbid car dealers from being open on Sundays, and I of course can't do this scenario on a Saturday. But it's a nice thought, and if damage-their-business revenge ends up being called for I wouldn't be surprised if I know people who would gladly take such initiative on their own. :-)

P.S.: I hope you liked the questions.

Yup. There will, alas, be some delay due to last night's escapades. Look for answers Sunday.

[2] The phone didn't ring, though it has done so before and since. Remember to consult phone's attempt at documentation to find out wy.

I've discovered that my cell phone will not ring or buzz while plugged in to charge. It's light comes on and the palm tree dances -- why a palm tree dancing (if that is what it is) is the prompt for an incoming call, I don't know -- but no noise.

I have yet to figure out the iconography of my cell phone. The main graphic is -- near as I can tell -- a clump of clouds with a sun at one side, and that sun blinks. Darned if I know why. Dancing palms sound more bizarre, though.

Unfortunately, the people trying to get you a tow (whether it is VW or AAA) are *severely* limited by the pool of tow truck drivers they are working with. It's not really in their control whether the two truck drivers opt to work the game/police venue. All they can do is call everyone they have access to and try.

I once got stuck in a rest area overnight because a car I was driving decided to die on I-80 in the middle of nowhere and there were no 24 hour tow trucks :(

I am sorry your new car is sick!

Yeah, it's frustrating, but I do realize they're at the mercy of the tow-truck drivers. I'm disappointed in their service, but I realize it's not entirely their fault. (How they handled some of it is; they could have been more up-front about the situation. But oh well.)

I once got stuck in a rest area overnight because a car I was driving decided to die on I-80 in the middle of nowhere and there were no 24 hour tow trucks :(

Yikes. Were you able to coast into a rest stop, or did you have to walk? I once had a breakdown within sight of an exit with a service plaza during the day; if it had to happen, that's the way to have it happen. :-)

in fact, I coasted, as the altrernator was dead. :)

first the radio wouldn't hold a station,. then the lights dimmed, and I had just enough momentum to coast into a parking space at the rest area. thankfully, I wasn't going uphill!

Speaking of weird places to break down in, that gives me a great idea for a post that takes the cake.... rural Mississippi!

Let me go find some gloves and a tuque and I shall be ready to regal you with my tale of woe...

Oh and that really sucks about your car and the service especially. Car-wise breaking down that early shows a manufacturing defect and not a shoddy car. (I could show you the reliability curves.. he he). If they repair it properly (but then when really is a repair perfect? Must stop being cynical...), your car should be fine for beyond the warranty period if you are worried about that. Oh, I'm getting all maintenancy lingo on that... See, I am back in the frame of mind for school.. I was getting worried....

Car-wise breaking down that early shows a manufacturing defect and not a shoddy car.

Is it likely to be a single part with a manufacturing defect, or is this likely to be my first of many trips to the dealer?

If they repair it properly (but then when really is a repair perfect? Must stop being cynical...), your car should be fine for beyond the warranty period if you are worried about that.

When I get near the end of the warranty period I plan to survey the then-current options in hybrids and see if I want to jump ship at that point. That gives me four years, so lots of time.

I was getting worried....

Glad to help. :-)

YICK!! I am so sorry you had to go through that. That sucks.

Well, at least I wasn't stuck on the shoulder being buzzed by high-speed traffic the way you were, so it can always be worse.

I still hope you read them the riot act.

That sucks whale. I'm sorry you had to go through that.

That said, I agree with the above commenter who says you should call the local AAA office.

I switched from Amoco Motor Club to AAA a few years ago, and I have found them to be magnificent. And you know from reading my journal, I don't use such glowing terms to describe most companies.

Yes, you should have gotten better service. How could they have "no idea" when a truck might be available? Even if they'd told you something like four hours, at least that would have been an answer!

Sorry you had to deal with all of that.

See, you should plan your breakdowns to be near your house. Kidding!

Tow truck drivers are always very dicey to deal with. I have spent my share of life waiting around for ones that took hours (AAA), but your story takes the cake. On the other hand this January in DC my friend got a flat at about 2 am. We had settled in for the long, inconclusive, unknowable wait, when the tow showed up -- 20 minutes. You just never know.

Did you call AAA or just VW? AAA might be somewhat better about not jerking you around all night, I think.

See, you should plan your breakdowns to be near your house. Kidding!

At least I didn't have groceries melting in the car! (I had stopped at Pinsker's for wine and a new calendar, not at Kosher Mart, but if I had stopped at the latter, at least I could have sent them home with Dani.)

Wow, getting a tow that quickly at 2AM is impressive. You're right; it's all a matter of who's in the area at the time.

I only called VW, but next time I'll know to work both channels. I had considered also calling AAA but didn't want to end up with two different pending tows -- that seemed unfair to the second driver if the timing was weird. Maybe I should have, though.

Even if you do get better service today, I can think of plenty reasons why you might want to send VW a nasty letter in addition to playing hardball with the people at the dealership. Send said nasty letter to the head of the dealership by fax and certified mail (so there's no way they can pretend they didn't get it) and CC VW's regional/national headquarters.

Hope it gets cleared up soon!

Good idea; thanks. A calm, written complaint will certainly be forthcoming.

Aside to the guys who recorded the "thank you for holding" messages: you keep using that word "momentarily"; I don't think it means what you think it means.

It's the little technical advancements that make all the difference to quality of life. I want to give a Nobel Peace Prize to whoever came up with the idea of enhancing these message-queue systems to give you a realistic idea of how much longer it'll be. ("Your call will be serviced in approximately... three... minutes.")

Well, it's good for *my* peace anyway. Just getting that little bit of information about queue length drops my blood pressure dramatically. I wish more companies were using it...

Oh yes. I wish that innovation would hurry up and become mainstream. That information is really helpful. A Nobel prize would not be overkill.

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irritation, thy name is Volkswagen

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