Hodu [Hashem] ki tov

[cellio]

(The subject means "It is good to give thanks to God"; it's a holiday pun of sorts because "hodu" also means "turkey".)

We went to my parents' house for Thanksgiving as usual. There were seven of us, including my sister and her two kids.

It was weird to have Thor absent. Thor was my parents' golden retriever, who would have been 14 last month but died two months ago. On my mother's birthday, more's the pity. He was a good dog. They were really attached to him and they took it hard, but he had a good life and 14-minus-two-weeks is pretty good for a golden retriever. They haven't said anything yet about getting another dog. (There's almost always been a dog in that house.)

When my parents' basement flooded in September they lost their electric roaster, and I'd been thinking about replacing that for them in December. (I always have trouble identifying suitable gifts for them.) But they decided they wanted it for Thanksgiving, so so much for that idea. The turkey was done in five hours in the roaster; it was probably done sooner, as we measured the temperature at 200, but it was not dry. The skin was very crispy and that kept the insides moist. For those who missed my update to an earlier post, we determined that Butterball turkeys contain no actual butter, so I was able to eat it.

We got there before my sister and my mother mentioned that she would be bringing a mincemeat pie for dessert. This raised the question of just what's in mincemeat anyway; I certainly remember actual meat from my Italian grandmother's pies, but my mother asserted that the filling you buy in a store contains no meat. A little time with Google revealed that the traditional recipe involves beef and pork but that there are non-meat versions, so this remained a mystery. When my sister came we learned that she had bought the pie, not made it; she was pretty sure there was no meat in the filling, but commercial pie crusts contain lard more often than not, so I declined on that basis. (And if it didn't have lard, it probably had butter anyway.) I hope my sister did not feel rejected that I declined all three of the desserts she brought -- the others being cheesecake and fudge containing milk -- but I took some of the latter two home, so that probably helped. And it's not like the meat/dairy thing should come as a surprise by now. Oh well. It's not like I needed the dessert. :-)

There was an odd social dynamic at one point. When my sister and I were growing up, there were strict rules about the TV: it couldn't be on during meals, and if it was on you had to be watching it. No background TV, and arguments about parallel processing didn't wash. (Fine with me; I can't read while a TV is on, or pay attention to craft-work or the like.)

As soon as my sister's family arrived the kids made beelines for the TV (niece) and computer (nephew), and the TV stayed on the entire time until we left. At high volume. My niece, who was nominally watching the TV, was sitting in a chair with a laptop and headphones. After several hints about the volume being an impediment to conversation my sister finally told her to turn it down, but no one told her to turn it off. And, err, my niece is in college; we're not talking about a young kid who hasn't yet acquired clues about interacting with other people. I'm surprised my parents didn't object.

One result, though, was that Dani and I left earlier than we would have otherwise, because competing with the TV was annoying and it was really hard to have a conversation. They don't have separate living room and family room; it's one big room. That and the kitchen are the comfortable gathering places, and my mother wanted to be out of the kitchen.

I wish we'd been able to have more of a conversation with my parents, but I didn't feel I could tell them "you have to turn that off or go to another room" in their own house. I found myself idly wondering if they are beginning to have hearing problems; maybe it didn't seem so loud to them. Hmm.

Other than that, though, it was a nice visit!

Apropos of nothing... Since getting the broken window replaced in my car, the horn no longer sounds when I lock or unlock the car with the remote. It does sound if I push the button. This is not a complaint. :-)

Comments

[ealdthryth.livejournal.com]

I occasionally turn the TV on for background noise. I find that I do that more in the past year or so. I put it on while I am reading email and such, so I'm not even in the same room. I'm not sure why I started that, since before then I didn't turn it on unless I was watching it. I think it may have started when I was home alone all day. I have noticed that I do that less now that I am working and interacting with people more.

We had some friends who had SCA get togethers at their home. The TV was always on. The living room was fairly small. I found it quite annoying to compete with the TV. At least there were a few other rooms to which we could escape. Other times when it is a smaller group of people, a TV being on doesn't bother me.

[patsmor.livejournal.com]

All of which is better than a boyfriend who always turned on the TV as background when I stayed over with him; I actually noticed he was watching it over my shoulder during a, um, tender moment. I can laugh about it now; it was not a selling point on a long-term relationship ;-)

I, too, turn on the TV when I feel alone, frequently in another room. It does make it feel as though the house is less empty.

[dglenn.livejournal.com]

"It's so sweet when you gaze lovingly into my eyes like that."

"Actually, I'm watching the reflection of the television in your glasses."

"You!" [swat]

Fortunately the step after swatting me was to break down into giggles for the next five to ten minutes over the fact that I'd said something that bratty. (That was a fun relationship.)

[cellio]

"Actually, I'm watching the reflection of the television in your glasses."

I'd've swatted you, too -- velocity to be determined by how much you smiled while you said it. :-)

[goljerp]

My brother in law has the TV on all the time, and now my nephews turn it on whenever they're in a room with a TV. I agree, it's distracting, and I don't like it. My feeling is that if you're going to watch the TV, fine, but don't keep it on when having a conversation with people. (Hmm... maybe some people are using it like the Radio -- for background music? Because I don't really mind having the radio or music on in the background, as long as it isn't so loud that I have trouble hearing the people I'm talking with...)

[cellio]

Interesting question about TV versus radio. I find the radio less annoying, but I think that's because of the nature of what's typically broadcast on each. I would probably find talk radio as annoying as the TV, but most radio-aired music fades into the background in a way that dialogue, car chases, and explosions don't.