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clothing rave

nsingman asked for a rant or rave (he didn't specify) about bras. Ok, I can do that. :-)

I don't know when bras -- as opposed to corsets -- were invented, but boy, I'd sure like to thank the person responsible! Corsets might be ok at doing the job (this is based on observation, not direct experience), but they look pretty uncomfortable, and just letting 'em hang loose would be horrible for someone my size. I tried that at Pennsic once (that being an environment where it wouldn't raise eyebrows), and I didn't get through one day. Swing swing swing whap whap whap bounce bounce bounce -- how does one manage to get through the day like that?! So I am delighted that a straightforward solution exists for under $10 per.

Which isn't to say that there aren't bad bras out there -- there sure are. Ones that pinch, or don't fasten tightly, or have straps that are too long for short people like me, or that itch, or whatever. The worst ones are the ones that try to be sexy but end up just being decorative. That might be fine for the AA-cups out there, but not for everyone. I believe it is possible to make something that is both functional and attractive, but forced to choose I'll go with function almost every time.

I have no problem with people who find bras restrictive and would rather go without. If that's what makes you happy -- or if you're small enough to be free of this particular burden -- then go for it! I, meanwhile, will revel in the joy of bodily protrusions that stay approximately where I put them until I'm ready to do something else with them. I didn't say bouncing is universally bad, after all -- I just want to control when it happens. :-)

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I've seen both the joy and pain of extremely large (my wife was a KK cup before reduction surgery many years ago, now she's DD). I think she would second your sentiments.

I hadn't heard of KK before. How does the progression work? In particular, how does incrementing the letter interact with doubling it? For example, is there such a thing as CC between C and D?

I'm just a C myself, but even that is enough to be a hassle without a bra.

I hadn't heard of KK before. How does the progression work?

Hey, don't ask me. I'm a guy. I just know they were fun to play with before, and are still fun today!

(did I say that with my public fingers).

Does your wife know you're talking like that here? :-)

Ummm. No.

Feel free to delete.

Oh, I'm not bothered. And your wife sounds pretty cool, so I doubt she would be either. I was just curious. (

nsingman is very explicit in his interest in this area of anatomy, which is why I thought teasing him about it would be ok.)

I've said it before, I'll say it again. My philosophy was best expressed by Cy Coleman:

My thoughts may stray
My eyes may roam
The neighbor's grass may seem much greener
Than the grass right here at home

If pretty girls excite me
Well, that's life
But just in case, you didn't know
I love my wife

My mind at times
May dwell on sex
If someone's rating dreams
Then most of mine I guess are double X

So dimpled knees delight me
Well, that's life
But just in case, you hadn't heard
I love my wife

Like bait that wriggles
And it makes catfish bite
A lady jiggles
And my eyes gotta light
Upon so sweet a sight

And if I shake
Break out in spots
Don't fret, it's not swine fever dear
Your swine has merely got the hots

If rosy lips invite me
Well, that's life
But just in case, you couldn't guess
I love my wife

My mind at times
May dwell on sex
If someone's rating dreams
Then most of mine I guess are double X

If rosy lips invite me
Well, that's life
But just in case, you couldn't guess
Or hadn't heard
Or didn't know
I love my wife
I love my wife
I love my wife

And I didn't even consider it teasing. I wave my freak flag high! :-)

OK, so I googled. There appears to be an explanation here (http://www.bellaonline.com/articles/art25542.asp), with a good discussion on fitting large size women. My wife was very happy with "Making It Big". There is another explanation here (http://www.bras-r-us.gb.net/sizes.html). Another is here (http://www.afraidtoask.com/breast/breastsize.html) (NSFW).

Under $10 per? You're very lucky. (What brand, out of curiosity?)

Bras give me trouble. I need them, but I hate shopping for them.

So far I have found only one brand with shoulder clasps that actually stay in place. (With other brands, I run into problems with them slipping, which makes for awkward moments even with the most comfortable bras.) I end up paying ~$28 per unit, or ~$17 if I get lucky and run into a sale.

(What brand, out of curiosity?)

Y'know, that's an excellent question. I buy 'em at K-Mart, and I know them when I see them but I don't actually know the brand name (and it's faded from the tags on my current ones). If I remember, I'll post a comment here after the next time I visit the store. (I need some socks, so that probably won't be too long.)

I've had the best luck with clasps on wide straps made of non-slippery material. The silky-satiny look may be attractive to some, but it's not very practical.

I've had the best luck with clasps on wide straps made of non-slippery material. The silky-satiny look may be attractive to some, but it's not very practical.

I agree. The non-slip kind I've found use plain, opaque fabric for the straps. Another thing that seems to help is that the clasps on the straps are unpainted metal rather than plastic or coated metal.

"I don't know when bras -- as opposed to corsets -- were invented,"

As a student of information science, I pride myself on the ability to find nearly anything on the Internet. This wasn't hard. Google produces 789,000 hits for "history bra" The History of the Bra. Did they include any reference scene in The Aviator, I wonder? :D

I was waterbearing at Pennsic, when a female fighter yelled "Arrggghh!!" for no apparent reason. I asked her if she was okay. She replied, "I hate it when I just get into armor and my bra strap breaks!"

By the by, my personal rant about bras (literally speaking as an outsider! :D), glasses are referred to as "a pair of glasses", because there's 'two' in every one. Pants are referred to as "a pair of pants", because there's 'two' in every one. Why don't we refer to bras as "a pair of bras"? Aren't there 'two' in every one???

"Dr. A", a.k.a. Isaac Asimov, in The Sensuous Dirty Old Man (a book that helped me not get dates in high school), credits the "Bosom-Rehabilitation Associates".

The language is inconsistent. If you can talk about a pair of pants, why not a pair of shirts (excluding sleeveless)? And if you argue that the bulk of what pants cover is legs (which come in pairs) but the bulk of what a shirt covers is the torso (which doesn't), I'll counter with panties. :-) (I was going to counter with briefs, but decided not to invite the obvious comment.)

Although, for parity, I will have to know (rummaging back through my Jr. High School memories) that wearing a 'strap is probably equally uncomforatable, if not more so, than the subject of this discussion.

That would not surprise me in the least. If nothing else, people who wear bras tend to wear them all the time, so you tend to get used to the feel.

Pants, when first generally worn, were two separate items, one for each side. A "glass" is an old term for a lens, and a monocle is a single one.

A brassiere, on the other hand, is not a divisible item.

My beauteous and oft-praised

jungle_goddess, who isn't very busty, still complains about the discomfort from bouncing if she's out and about braless. I can understand that, though I happen to prefer the braless look on women. Go figure. :-)

My understanding is that there are a fair number of attractive, functional and comfortable bras, but two main problems stand in the way of most women enjoying them. One is that so many women apparently wear the wrong size, and the other is that those bras can be quite costly.

I can understand that, though I happen to prefer the braless look on women. Go figure. :-)

Well of course; you're breast-obsessed, by your own admission. :-) (I assume, though I don't believe you've stated, that this obsession is limited to those of the human female variety. :-) )

"I assume, though I don't believe you've stated, that this obsession is limited to those of the human female variety. :-)"

Naw, if he's anywhere near my age, he's drooled over green Orion slave girls, Betazed counselors, 7 of 9, Vulcan sub-commanders ... :D

Which brings me to another rant... Why is it that all females throughout the entire galaxy have exactly two breasts??? Vulcans, Orions, Betazed, Klingons, everybody.

This isn't even an Earth standard. Cows have 4, pigs have 8. Why is it that Hollywood is willing to spend several hundred dollars for head prosthetics for convincing looking aliens, but won't put fifty cents worth of foam rubber under a tunic??? Has it been proved that sentience requires exactly two nipples???

What about Total Recall? I haven't seen it personally, but I've heard one particular character mentioned often by a number of men ...

http://www.themakeupgallery.info/weird/breasts/recall.htm

Sometimes my ability to find nearly anything online impresses even myself! :D I haven't made it a link because it's probably not kosher to put not-worksafe links on somebody else's LJ. :D

I've also received private e-mails stating that there's a "Triple Breasted Whore of Erotica Six" in the Hitchhiker novels, Tellarite females (so far unseen) from Star Trek have eight, and in the short story collection "Earthman's Burden" the Hoka have four (and look like teddy bears)

Okay, so I'm toning down the rant to a grumble. But, I would still like to see an SF TV series where one of the regular characters is a four breasted female. No nude shots, just a little foam under the tunic.

Okay. So apparently LJ will automatically make it a link. Sorry about that! WARNING: NOT WORK SAFE!!!

I have no problem with links in comments; it's up to the reader to follow them or not. I would probably object if you directly embedded problematic images. :-)

I don't know your age (I'm 44), but you're absolutely correct (except about the drool part; I've developed a bit of self-control). :-)

I checked your profile. We're from the same generation, I was born in 1958. BTW, as long as we've brought up men our age and green Orion slave-girls,...

In the episode(s) "Menagerie", Vina isn't really an Orion slave-girl, the Talosians just give Captain Pike the fantasy that she is. Which means the only real Orion slave-girl that we saw in TOS was in the episode "Whom Gods Destroy". The character of Marta was played by Yvonne Craig, better known to men our age as ... Bat-girl! :D Two fantasy women in one! :D :D

True, though if memory serves, one of Marta's lines (as she tried to stab Kirk) was something like "He is my lover, and I must kill him." That would dampen my ardor a bit. :-)

Close, as the discussion below alludes. I'm obsessed with humanoid female breasts. :-)

Many women wear a too-small cup with a too-large band making up the difference, because that's the best fit they can get with the reasonably-priced bras (by which I mean under $40) that department stores stock.

Plus-size stores carry larger sizes, but the bands don't start until 38 or 40. I'm a 34 J.

Buying a 40 and shortening the band isn't really an option, because taking in the sides would lead to the straps getting pulled off the sides of my shoulders, and there generally isn't a good place to take in the middle.

A couple of years ago I spent close to $100 on a high-quality bra. It fit wonderfully the first day, but on the second day I noticed that some of the stiffening felt had crumpled, and it never fit right again.

I found some 34F bras a while ago, and they fit reasonably well as long as I can ignore the end of the underwire rubbing into my underarm. (I usually manage to switch bras before it starts to draw blood. Usually.) $75 wasted for two bras that I can hardly stand to wear.

Right now I'm wearing a sports bra that gives me a floppy uniboob, which is even less attractive than going braless, but I'm trying to let the underwire welts heal up.

Most big-breasted women I know HATE their bras.

(And yes, I've heard about Decent Exposures for years, but their bras are neither adjustable nor sized in the over-the-shoulder measurement, nor do they offer underwires. They look more like "leisure bras" than something that could both support me and look reasonable under a thin t-shirt or dress blouse.)

I loathe, hate, and despise bras except under some heavy dresses that chafe my nipples when I dance in them, or under something with opacity problems. I'm so grateful not to need them. Even cotton ones itch after a few hours. I have 4, 2 are over 20, and the other 2 are close.

So a couple of years ago I went to buy a new one. I went to a big mall, (always an occaision of tension) because I figured there'd be one there, if anywhere. It was awful. There was nothing that even might fit.

My patient friend and I eventually went to a fancy lingerie store, where I was expertly measured and pronounced an unfittable 38AA. I asked about "training" bras, but no. So I quick bought a stretchy camisole and fled. And I'm not tossing out my nigh-dead bras. At least they don't keep peeking out of my neckline unbidden. Maybe someday I'll try again.

Rant done.

I'm no expert, but I would expect a AA to not need a bra. I think you did the right thing by just going with the camisole.

I have never in my adult life found a comfortable bra. I took suggestions from all my friends that swore by certain brands, but nothing worked.

Then I became pregnant and bought the nursing bra sold at the local Walmart. It was comfy! I still wear them, almost 4 years later. (no, not the same one)

Underwires are evil incarnate!

Underwires are evil incarnate!

Yes! C'mon; if I need enough support to apply wire, then that thin band isn't going to do squat. And ouch!

When my wife was in the large sizes, she got Cameo bras, which didn't have an underwire. Neither do the bras from Making It Big (http://www.makingitbigonline.com/).

Evil, yes. But I have yet to find anything that works better. :(

I wonder what would happen if I took an underwire bra and replaced the thin flat "wire" with something round, like a piece of thin vinyl tubing.

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