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Johan
Johan was a civil engineer. A couple weeks ago he fell at a work site, breaking through a railing that was supposedly rated for ten times his weight and falling 20 feet onto gravel. Miraculously, he came out of it with broken bones but nothing important inside getting smooshed. His head, spine, and internal organs were all fine, from what I understand.
Dani and I visited him in the hospital Sunday night. He said he was in the stage where you just wait for the bones to knit back together. He was in good spirits and believed that the worst was past. He said he'd failed his dexterity check (so didn't avoid the fall) but made his saving throw when he hit. And less than a day later he was gone.
I'd known him in the SCA for years, and then he moved to Pittsburgh about 14 years ago and we got a lot closer. He was a kind person, going out of his way to help others. He liked to say that he did this out of enlightened self-interest (he was also very smart and insightful), not altruism, but either way he made a real difference for a great many people. He was a good man, and his death has left a huge hole in the lives of his family and friends.
Johan stood up for what was right. He left a job when his employers insisted that he do something unethical, and had a stack of job offers as soon as word hit the street. He was one of the "three bad peers of AEthelmearc" who stood up to the SCA corporation when things got dicey there. When the owners of the school his kids attended suddenly closed up shop and disappeared, in June, he and his wife and a few others dove in and created a new school before fall classes. They could have just found another school to enroll their kids in, but there were dozens of kids left in the lurch so they did it the hard way. Johan, personally, did most of the renovation work that was needed before they could get a license to operate. Since then he dedicated many weekends to making the school even better.
Johan was one of the best parents I've ever known. He gave his kids the freedom they needed to explore while holding them to standards of behavior that far exceed what we get from many parents these days. His family was very important to him, and I feel really sad for his wife and two sons.
Part of what makes this so shocking, I think, is that Johan was so full of life. He was the sort of person who's too stubborn to die. Aside from the fall he was healthy. He was a few years older than I am.
I know that other people have posted public memories of Johan. If you comment with links, I'll make sure they all get printed out for Arianna. If it's not obvious from your user name who you are, please sign so I can tell her that too.
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