Yom Kippur theology

[cellio]

This year the contrast between two statements in the machzor (special prayer book for these holidays) struck me. We have both of the following statements:

1. For transgressions against God Yom Kippur attones, but for transgressions against other people, YK does not attone until you have made peace with that person. [1]

2. The "release": I forgive those who have wronged me and please don't punish them on my account, and I hope they say the same about me. (This is a paraphrase.)

If I am "off the hook" for something I did via #2 (the other person made this blanket statement) but I never actually made amends, how can I attone under #1 -- we didn't make peace? Or is the point to be strict on my own actions (I must make peace) but liberal on others'? I could think that #2 is for unknown offenses (I can't make amends if I don't know I wronged you), except that the text of the release says "intentional and unintentional".

(Am I correct in assuming that #2 is not a liberal innovation? I've never actually used or studied a traditional machzor, though I am motivated to find one now because a number of the translations [2] in ours struck me as wrong and I want to know what the Hebrew really says.)

[1] There's what amounts to a good-faith exclusion here, so you can't be hosed by someone who consistently refuses to forgive you.

[2] Reform prayer books before Mishkan T'filah feature a mix of loose translations and "alternative readings" (usually but not always marked as such). I am in the position of knowing enough Hebrew to see the issues but not enough to be able to just translate the text myself.

Comments

[zevabe.livejournal.com]

Part 2, or at least that sentiment, appears in Orthodox liturgy in the bedtime Shema, as well as YK stuff.

As for part 1, yes, the sinner must seek forgiveness from the wronged party, and while refusing more than 3 times is considered mean, not everything counts towards that. What I understand the halakha (Rambam, Shulchan Arukh) to say is that one should apologize. If rebuffed, return with 3 people who the offended person likes to help you plead your case (I'll vouch that he is a good person & sincere in his apology). If rebuffed yet again, return with a minyan to help you plead your case & to show that you apologize publically. At that point, the offended should probably forgive you (presumably you also need to do whatever other sorts of reparations are applicable, such as returning the stolen object or paying for the injury you caused or so on).

In terms of reconciling them, consider what R' Herschel Shechter said: We have to walk in G-d's ways. Even G-d doesn't forgive those who are completely unrepentant. But if one has hirhurei teshuva (considers repentance) then G-d does forgive one. So it is meritorious and a relief of a psychological burden to do the same.

[cellio]

Rambam: I knew about the three tries, but I didn't know about increasing the witnesses like that. Interesting. (Yeah, I've been assuming that sincere requests for forgiveness must be accompanied by reparations where applicable.)

But if one has hirhurei teshuva (considers repentance) then G-d does forgive one. So it is meritorious and a relief of a psychological burden to do the same.

Makes sense. Thanks.