junk mail: a reply (snark)

[cellio]

There is a class of junk mail that tries earnestly to appear to be something Official and Important. You know the type -- the security paper with the three perforated strips around the edges that says something like "important tax documents" on the outside. These usually pique my curiosity enough to see what the pitch is, on the way to the recycle bin.

Today's (emblazoned with "economic stimulus" on the outside) informed me that according to public records, the mortgage I got on $date_we_bought_the_house at $interest_rate is way too high and they're here to help with a 5.25% fixed-rate loan (terms unspecified).

Dudes, we've refinanced twice since then. We're currently at 4.5%, so your 5.25% offer (which sounds high, actually) isn't very appealing -- something you'd presumably know if you checked those public records you were going on about. :-) And by way of further review, your perforated edges were poorly implemented, causing me to tear your special message while opening it. The other two mortgage pitches I've received so far this month were of much higher physical quality.

Comments

[ginamariewade.livejournal.com]

I got one like that from a car dealership one day last week.
The insignia at the top, with eagles and shields, actually said "The Office of Important Stuff."
I lol'ed.

I should have scanned and posted it, but I had other things on my mind.

[cellio]

"Office of Important Stuff"? Wow, that's funny. It's good to know that someone at one of these places has a sense of humor. :-)

[miz-hatbox.livejournal.com]

4.5? Wow!!! I think the best we managed was at 5%.

[cellio]

We paid for half a point, I think (did the math; this was better than a higher rate with no points), and we got a quarter-percent discount by buying from an institution we were already doing business with. And we have the 20% equity that gets you out of the first risk category, but I assume you do too.

[miz-hatbox.livejournal.com]

Sure. I forget how we did with points, though I recall that when we got this mortgage we paid off a substantial chunk. I'm not complaining about what we've got, by any stretch. Just commenting that 4.5 is very very nice.

[http://users.livejournal.com/merle_/]

I love those envelopes. As a registered Republican *cough* I get a survey or two a year in Important Envelopes Which Cannot Be Discarded. (luckily, I feel zero compulsion to save them up and get them dealt with correctly; they just get laughed at and torn into quarters)