cellio: (shira)
Sleep is for the weak and unworthy, right? Or something like that. :-)

I'm finding that when I do finally settle down to sleep, the brain is still going and it's hard to turn it off. And then I'm waking up early with more of the same; I've only been awakened by the alarm once so far, not for lack of trying. I'm running on about 5-6 hours per night here, which is not my norm. I'm not sleepy during the day, but I have to make sure I get a good night's sleep Saturday somehow, because I'm driving home on Sunday. Well, at least Harry Potter and the CD that [livejournal.com profile] murmur311 gave me (thanks!) will keep me company. :-) (I packed a bunch of other CDs in case the audio book didn't work, but it did so I probably won't touch them.)

Today was a good day. Our service is in pretty good shape except for two things: we haven't yet done a full walk-through (that'll be tomorrow), and the cantorial student didn't have the tape of weekday nusach for me today. He'll have it tomorrow and this is a forgiving group, so that should be fine. But there's not a lot of time to learn it.

We've done a detailed talk-through of the service, with (as our advisor strongly suggested) post-it notes in the siddur for practically everything, including page cues and the "stand up now" gesture. This is right for a group not used to working together and using an unfamiliar siddur; I'd like to think that when we all go home to our familiar congregations wtih familiar liturgy, this wouldn't be such an issue. But maybe you have to lead a few dozen services before you're that comfortable; I forget. (And certainly when I was leading at Tree of Life I made my own doctored-up copy of the siddur, because neither the siddur nor the congregation was familiar. If I ever get around to learning the weekday shacharit service I won't need to do that, though.)

shacharit )

class: b'nei mitzvah )

class: birth and baby namings )

class: Jewish education )

chug )

class: congregational singing )

ma'ariv, misc )

Tuesday

Jul. 14th, 2004 12:11 pm
cellio: (shira)
Today was a full day. We actually had a real break (almost 30 minutes); during that time I tried to post Monday's entry but saw no evidence that it took. I guess I'll find out when I connect to attempt to post this. I'm sorry for sending large bursts of stuff out all at once.

The campus store and the library have very limited hours during the summer. I haven't yet been to the library (sigh -- who's got time? but I want to), but the store stayed open later today to accommodate us. I think it was worthwhile for them; lots of people skipped part of dinner to buy books and the like. I picked up the JPS Hebrew-English Tanach (I wanted to see it "in the flesh" first to see the size of the print, which is adequate), passed on Braude's Book of Legends this time (highly recommended, but I'll bet I can improve on the $75 price via the used market), and picked up a new talit. I have a talit and it has signifance to me, but there have been times when I wanted the option of a larger one, particularly when leading services. (The one I have, which belonged to Dani's grandfather, is the small "scarf" size.) It turns out that the large size is too big for me (drags the ground, which isn't an appropriate thing to do to tzitzit), but there is an intermediate size that gives me enough material to draw the talit up over my head for the sh'ma, which I can't do with the one from Dani's family. I'd also rather use a larger one when leading services. So now I have that option. I was going to use it for the first time at Friday's service, which I'm helping to lead, but I see wisdom in getting used to it first, so I'll be using it tomorrow.

The planning for that service got off to a rocky start due to logistics (not at all due to the people, who are wonderful), but we finally had a good solid hour and change to go over it tonight. Tomorrow we will meet with our staff advisor about our plans (each group has an advisor), and then tomorrow night we'll solidify things down to the level of who does what and sticking post-it notes in the siddur and stuff. I'm doing all the music leading; that wasn't my plan, but the other two really want to not do this and like me in that role. I introduced them to some new melodies tonight. Some of that was explicit experiment; I figured that if they could pick them up quickly (just by listening) then the others could too. And they did. So we'll be using a niggun that my rabbi taught us at the last Shabbaton, and a new meditation before the Sh'ma (and setting of the Sh'ma) that our cantorial soloist introduced some months back (by Jeff Klepper). Our group feels that in this setting, each service should have a lot that is familiar and some that is new, because (1) we're experimenting and learning and (2) this is a group of synagogue leaders who will then disperse, not an established congregation where you would be much more conservative about change. I'm looking forward to the service; I think we've done a good job of preparing. (I seem to be the unofficial leader of the group, but not for lack of trying to push decisions out to the other two.)

people in need of a clue-by-four )

All that aside, onward to today's nifty classes.

class: text study )

lunch: leadership development )

class: Jewish music )

class: shiva/funeral )

chug: trope )

class: illness and the community )

ma'ariv )

Monday

Jul. 13th, 2004 02:24 pm
cellio: (shira)
The learning in this program is great. There's a lot of it, though; they're working us fairly hard. The day officially starts at 8:15 for shacharit and ends around 9:15 at the end of ma'ariv, with no breaks longer than 15 minutes so far (and precious few of those) -- and then there's the occasional bit of homework, and the planning sessions for the services we'll lead, and individual consultations, to say nothing of decompression time. For me, writing these notes is an essential part of distilling everything I've learned into knowledge that will survive the week. So, onward.

I am sharing the Friday shacharit service with two other people (for reference, Steve and Diane). We had a huddle at lunch today, where we talked broadly about the style we'd like and decided which siddur to use. (HUC has several.) We ended up deciding to use the latest draft of Mishkan T'filah (yes, they're doing weekday too and not just Shabbat), which has the advantage of being equally unfamiliar to all of us. This should involve pushing some boundaries, after all. We're all a little concerned about learning the weekday nusach (melodies) in time; I ended up telling them that I think I can do it and they said "ok, you do that then". I hope I can deliver. (The weekday nusach we use at my congregation is different from what they use here. I should check with the cantorial staff member about that.)

We were going to meet tonight after ma'ariv to discuss the service in more detail, but the organizers declared a group run to Graeter's ice cream, and a little casual social time sure seemed like a good idea. It was after 10:30 when we got back, though, so I'll find Steve and Diane at breakfast.

The instructors so far have all been great. Some of the classes have had problems of pacing and going off-topic (some rabbis are just too polite to curb conversation, it appears), but the people are great and there's still plenty of good material.

(Someone remind me later that there's some stuff I want to say about program organization and credentials, but it's too late to get into tonight.)

morning service )

class: Tanach )

class: how to lead worship )

chug: trope )

Plum Street Shul )

class: how to write a d'var torah )

evening service )

And now, it is late and "laptop neck" is setting in, that kink in the neck that comes from hunching over to be able to see the monitor, so I'm done for tonight.

Sunday

Jul. 12th, 2004 06:35 pm
cellio: (shira)
They announced registration for 10 to noon, but almost everyone was here already so by 10:30 all but two people were checked in. This gave us some time to mingle and meet some of the staff before lunch and the formal orientation. I met another rabbinic student who knows my rabbi. :-) (From Camp Harlem and some NFTY activities.) During dinner he talked a little about what led him to decide to become a rabbi, and I noticed that if you made very few word substitutions, it was basically what drew me to Judaism. The resonance was strong, and I look forward to hearing more from him.

leading services )

class: history of liturgy )

Between this class and dinner I had about fifteen minutes to visit the room with the internet connection. (This consists of a hub, extra network cables, and one laptop connected to said hub.) I was able to glance at email (didn't see it all, and it looks like a mailing list I own went haywire) and make one LJ post. Another that I also had queued up refused to post -- don't know why but I'll try again when I post this.

Dinner included a brief talk on birkat hamazon, the grace after meals, and an invitation for us to start leading this at future meals. Having semi-botched this at our congregational retreat in May (one melodic bit I didn't know, and some unfamiliar text in the specific version we were using), so I'd like to try again.

worship class )

Then it was on to the ma'ariv service. We are to fill out a brief questionnaire (a "service diary") after each service, ideally before leaving the chapel. Read more... )

An interesting bit from the introdutions at the orientation: of the 25 participants, six are converts and another (roughly) eight or nine returned to Judaism later in life (many from Orthodox childhoods). I knew that this group would not be representative of the Reform population in general, as it takes a certain degree of commitment and enthusiasm to enter a program like this, but I was still struck by the numbers.

The chugim that are on the schedule (four days) are, basically, electives. Some meet every day and some are one-shots. They haven't given a complete list of the one-shots; the ones that meet every day are two levels of Hebrew and a cantillation class. I'm going to do the cantillation; it'll be nice to get some formal structure there. It may also give me ideas on how we can teach this topic in my congregation.

The building containing the internet access was already locked right after the ma'ariv service. Sigh. Tomorrow's schedule is pretty full, but maybe there will be some breaks at useful times. I'm just going to carry the laptop with me tomorrow, since the dorm is not all that near the classroom space. (Not far, but making a round-trip could be the difference between useful time and not.) All I really need to carry is the laptop and the mouse; for short bursts I don't need the power cord, and they've got network cable.

cellio: (mandelbrot)
Friday night my synagogue had its once-every-two-years "adult b'nei mitzvah" (I still hate that name, but I'm a pedant). There were six women this time, one of whom actually did not read torah Friday night because she wanted to do it Saturday morning instead in the informal service. They did a decent job overall, and I made note of two who seem to be interested in reading torah again in the morning group. (Three, counting the woman who did that this time.) So we'll see if that pans out.

I missed the morning service, alas, because Dani and I went to the kingdom academy event in Erie. (Why do the good things all have to pile onto the same weekends?) The event was being held in a synagogue's school, and part of the agreement was that members of the congregation could attend the classes, so the folks in charge asked me to organize a track of classes on Jewish topics. That went pretty well overall, though the number of congregants wasn't high and dwindled over the day. We had an overview class taught by Eleazar ha-Levi (the person who wrote the Complete Anachronist issue a couple years back), a class on the Khazars which was very good, a class on Salamone Rossi and his music taught by [livejournal.com profile] lefkowitzga which was also very good, a class on Hebrew poetry, and a class on Hebrew manuscripts. The organizers had asked for some sort of round-table discussion, so I finished with an item called "being Jewish in the SCA". I left it fairly open so that we could talk about whatever people wanted to discuss -- choosing a persona, coping with feasts, tricks for attending events on Shabbat, and so on. None of the congregants showed up, though; it ended up being me, Eleazar, and Remus, who isn't Jewish but was just curious.

There was no formal feast but they had a buffet out all day (starting with the first break in classes). The food was varied and mostly low-key; I wonder if they did it as a quasi-pot-luck, with members of the host group each bringing something. Either they did not use the synagogue kitchen or the kitchen isn't kosher; that much I'm sure of. :-) So maybe the former; that would be consistent with the dishes that were there, all of which could stand up to being driven in from elsewhere. We've had events at sites where either there was no kitchen or we weren't allowed to use it; it's a challenge, but it can be done.

The event ended early and there was a dinner expedition forming, but Shabbat still had two hours to run so we had to decline. Pity the event didn't run later (and that it was held so close to the summer solstice :-) ). Oh well.

Since people were spread out I didn't get a feel for how many were there, but it seemed like a good turnout. I sometimes wonder if the academy events plan too many tracks of simultaneous classes for the number of people who come, but it seemed to have worked. I wonder if [livejournal.com profile] lyev got enough people for each class in his dance track.

This Wednesday Dani is heading off to a gaming convention (Origins). He has signed up mostly for games he's never played before, which is a good way to survey what's out there. I wonder how many he'll come home with this year. :-)

The choir had a discussion about Pennsic and beyond at the most recent practice. I'm not sure what will come of it. We will have a Pennsic performance, though the group is small and someone will be filling in as director. We won't have some of the material we were planning to have for it, but we'll have enough. Eh. It's not the performance we wanted to have, but it will do.

cellio: (shira)
We ended up talking a little bit about the Hebrew/English balance at services and the use of transliteration in the siddur. Some rabbis apparently hold the view that transliteration is a crutch that keeps people from actually learning Hebrew. I suspect that's not quite right.

I dislike reading from transliteration, and avoid it except when urgent even if it means I won't be able to say every word (due to being slow). On the other hand, when I was just starting to attend services and didn't know anything yet, I was really grateful to have it. I was able to use it to jump-start my participation, yet I did not lose my motivation to learn to read for real. I commented on this to my rabbi, who said something like "yeah, but you taught yourself trope too -- you're not typical". Actually, though, I suspect I am typical among that subset of the population that will learn to read anyway. It's just that most people will apparently settle for transliteration -- but if it weren't there they'd sit in silence, not say "gee, I'm not getting any help here; I better learn the language". Or so I theorize. (Data welcome.)

The real issue there, I guess, is that most people don't want to learn to read a foreign alphabet at speed. I'd rather give them some tools for participation than write them off. (And just to clarify, I'm pretty sure my rabbi shares that view. He's not the one who said transliteration should be eliminated.)

But I'd also be thrilled if I, personally, never had to rely on transliteration again. :-)

- - - - - - - -

In other news, I met with our cantorial soloist last night to discuss that service at the end of July. She is quite happy to have me doing most of the music, with other committee members doing some, and she said she would like to see more of this. So we'll be sort of a test case or something, to see how the congregation reacts. The subs are already mostly lined up for her maternity leave (which is going to be very short, because she wants to be back before the high holy days), but she pointed out that next summer there will be an opportunity to do more. No, she's not planning another kid (or if she is, she didn't share that information), but the congregation has managed to clear next summer of b'nei mitzvot, so services during the summer can be less formal and more experimental. (Next year's class is small, so we are taking the opportunity to do some sanctuary renovations.) I'd love to see more lay people being more involved in things like this.

We also talked about the trope class I want us to have in the fall or winter, and she's going to do what she can to make it happen. The lines of responsibility are a little fuzzy here, and we both want to make sure it doesn't fall through the cracks.

cellio: (shira)
I'm on a mailing list for synagogue music/musicians. It's mostly inhabited by cantors, and I try to just sit and listen.

Lately, though, they've been doing the "we don't get no respect" mantra, saying that synagogues underpay them and that non-proefessionals are cutting into their jobs (something like "how dare an accountant who sings part-time take away our jobs!"), and they've been tossing around the "union" word. And. Well.

I slept on this before sending it:
Read more... )
cellio: (shira)
Our cantor and our rabbi have discussed it, and they are both cool with me filling in for the former during that one service this summer. Woo hoo! So now the cantor and I will have a conversation about logistics.

I'm hoping that this will lead to qualified members of the congregation getting tapped to be substitutes all the time when a sub is needed. (Currently we hire subs.) I can think of a couple other people who are qualified and who, I suspect, are interested. I hope that once we've done it once they'll see that it's no harder than hiring a sub, as well as being cheaper.

(This may end up forcing a discussion of evaluating people. In other words, what do we do with the person who isn't qualified but who volunteers? Is it the cantor's call? Does she want that responsibility? But that's all in the future -- for now we're not calling for any volunteers; the chair of the worship committee, who is broadly considered to have a good voice and Hebrew competence, and who will be just back from the first session of the Sh'liach K'hilah program at the time, is doing it once. That should be enough qualifiers to keep other folks from getting grumpy.)

Shabbat

May. 9th, 2004 05:24 pm
cellio: (shira)
Friday's musical service went well. It looked like we had at least 300 people there (maybe 350 or 400), which is a lot more than normal. The congregational choir sang, which was nice, and some other cantorial members of the cantor's family were there too. Fun night!

I had an interesting conversation with our cantor about the service (or services?) the worship commitee will need to lead this summer. She expects to be out on maternity leave then, so she said she's working on lining up substitutes. We talked about stage-management issues when none of the people on the bima are regulars, and while I don't remember how we got there, I ended up saying (in an appropriate context) that there are certainly members of the worship committee who could competently fill that role for one week, and she said she really wished we'd volunteer in that case, and I said "ok, then I'm volunteering". (I also said I'm not the only one who could, though I of course don't know who else would.) Dunno where it will go (if it does); she and the rabbi will need to have a talk. I had previously made such a comment to the rabbi (during the last cantor's maternity leave), and it went nowhere. But maybe that cantor wasn't on board with the idea. I have been trying very hard to avoid stepping on any toes; music at services is her domain and I don't want her (or the rabbi) to perceive me as pushy. On the other hand, I'd much rather have one of us than an outside singer who might or might not even be Jewish, and she agrees with me on non-Jews, so we'll see. (I think the previous cantor was more interested in having a good singer than in having a Jew. I personally don't think we should have non-Jews leading any part of services, and the congregation has gotten better about that, but we're not completely there yet.)

Saturday morning had one bit of frustration, and I have to have a conversation I'm not looking forward to. During the service we go around the circle so people can say the names of people they're saying kaddish for, and recently we've started to also go around saying names before saying the prayer for healing. One of the people there (who used to be a regular, then disappeared for most of a year, then started showing up again a few weeks ago) treated this as a bit of a political soapbox, saying he wanted to add the names of all the Iraqi prisoners to the list. Saying that much would have been fine; going from there into a rant about the despicable behavior of the people responsible, on the other hand, was inappropriate. I don't disagree that the assessment of the behavior, but the healing portion of a Shabbat service is not the time and place for political diatribes. He should have saved it for the informal conversation afterwards. (It doesn't help that this particular individual, err, really likes to hear himself talk, so he is never brief and on-point.) So I was annoyed (but not fast enough to stop it on the spot), and I could tell some others were annoyed, and I've received one email complaint already. (It's not really my minyan, but people see it as mine when the rabbi isn't there.) I'm tempted to send him email, which will allow me to choose my words carefully without having to interact with him in real time, but calling is probably the correct thing to do.

After services we headed to Johan and Arianna's for a meeting of the Pennsic camp. (This was mostly to decide if we need to make any infrastructure changes this year and to decide what projects to tackle. This year we're going to try for some box benches, to solve both seating and stuff-containment problems.) It seems we don't see each other as frequently as we used to, now that two are no longer coworkers and one has dropped out of the choir and so on, so it was nice to see everyone and just hang out. (Well, not everyone; the out-of-town contingent didn't make it in.)

cellio: (moon)
Why I am considering staying in the Methodist Church, written by a committed member of the church who is a target of their discrimination. (Link via [livejournal.com profile] kayre.)

Thomas Jefferson on church and state, posted by [livejournal.com profile] dglenn in honor of the national day of prayer.

For Pittsburghers: Panim el panim, a discussion/panel with my rabbi, someone from the Islamic Center, and an Episcopal reverend. May 15, 4pm.

Tomorrow night's Shabbat service is another musical one. This will be the third; I really liked the first two. It looks like we are going to do this after the summer, too; Tuesday night we held auditions for an in-house band. Got a dozen people, which is great! (I wasn't there, so I don't know what skill levels we're dealing with, but I know we've got some good musicians in the congregation. I decided I'm too busy right now.)

This summer there will be one Shabbat when both rabbis will be away (and the cantor will be two weeks past her due date, so if she's still pregnant she'll probably be grumpy). So the worship committee will lead that Friday's service. Usually when groups (committees, brotherhood, etc) lead services, someone in the office assigns parts and mails out annotated photocopies ("tell them to stand here", "read this in Hebrew", "read this responsively in English", etc). That kind of bugs me, so at last night's meeting of the worship committee I said: Look, we're the worship committee; if we can't just lead a service out of the siddur, there's something wrong. So if you want to participate in this service and you don't normally come on Friday nights, you should come a few times in the next two months. At the next meeting we're going to look at the siddur and assign parts. I expected at least a little griping, but got none. Yay.

cellio: (star)
This is going to be kind of rambly. I'm trying to record a thought stream, not make an explicit point.

Launch point: B'rachot 8a, where the Amoraim are discussing places for torah study versus places for prayer and (later commenters) whether it is appropriate to suspend study in order to pray with a minyan. That is, if you're already in the study hall and there's no minyan and it's time to pray, do you pray there or go join the minyan? Some argue that study is more important than supporting the community in the minyan. This led us to a more general discussion: the tension between supporting community values and partaking of community offerings. Read more... )

cellio: (moon-shadow)
I've been wondering about this for a while: how do clergy pray? Not "what mechanics do they use" or "do they pray privately" or anything like that, but rather, how do clergy who are leading services set aside the stage-management aspects enough to be able to actually pray? Or do they mostly give up, on the theory that the officiant doesn't get to personally connect while doing so?

Of course it's not always this or always that, but I do sometimes wonder, when watching my rabbi, whether he gets out of the service anywhere near as much as I do as a mere participant. When I have been the leader, I've noticed varying degrees of this, from being purely a stage manager to being just one of the daveners. It depends on the formality of the setting, my connection to the other people there, and -- somewhat -- on the presence of microphones. (I feel that a mike fundamentally changes your role with respect to the other people. That one time I was leading services at Tree of Life during a power outage, I was actually glad that we were forced to all work together a little harder. And it's not like I can't make myself heard in a moderate-sized room...)

In our Shabbat morning minyan, the service practically runs itself and if the rabbi has to leave early we just keep going. This Shabbat that happened (unexpectedly); he looked at me and said "torah service?", I said "yes", and I led it while he left. (The torah reader, who would normally get dibs on this, had a sore throat and was trying to conserve word-count.) No problems there. When, last summer, the worship committee jointly led a Friday-night service (both rabbis were out of town), I spent the service feeling like I was herding cats and didn't really pray. (This is not a comment on the other people; it is a comment on the nature of group efforts.) Another time I and one other very-competent person led the Friday service and it went better, but I was still mindful of the fact that I was up on a bima with a mike in front of a congregation that wasn't fully participating. I think, though I haven't done it yet, that when I lead shacharit services at Tree of Life I'll just be one of the louder daveners, and that'll be kind of neat. Of course, I'm also confident that if I mis-step, half a dozen people will jump in to correct me. :-)

But to an extent, every person leading a service is paying attention to some meta-issues. How are we doing for time? Is the person with the next aliya ready to walk up here? What happened to the person who's supposed to read the announcements when I'm done with this prayer? Do we read tachanun today? And so on. I find myself wondering how often people who make a career of this really pray, as opposed to leading prayer. And while I'm talking here about Jewish prayer, I imagine the question generalizes to other religions.

Occasionally my rabbi and I will be the only ones who show up for a weekday service. (This happened this past week.) When that happens we just drop into Hebrew and go, independently for the Amidah per tradition rather than in unison as is common in the Reform movement. And he always thanks me for the opportunity when we're done.

One of these days I'll get around to asking my rabbi about this. I'll probably ask this summer during the sh'liach k'hilah program, too. It would be pretty frustrating if the people who are so committed to religion that they're willing to make a career of it are the ones who are least likely to be able to pray effectively during services!

cellio: (galaxy)
Last week one of the morning minyanaires asked if I would lead the service occasionally, and lent me a siddur when I said I needed to learn it better. (There's a big difference between being able to pray for yourself and being competent to lead a congregation.) This morning he asked how it was going ("slow progress", I said), and then he said something about me leading every Thursday (!). I said something like "let me get through it once before we schedule me for a regular slot, ok?". If I can do it correctly I would enjoy that, though.

I've been really enjoying the occasional opportunities to read Torah at my own congregation. (I almost said "periodic", but the cycle isn't regular yet.) I'm glad that we have something like ten people either reading already or interested in learning how. I think this will good for the community -- participation leads to engagement and investment.

I wonder which other religions have comparable opportunities for serious-but-not-formally-educated lay people to take on significant worship roles. My childhood congregation didn't, but that's only one data point.

(Aside: is there a better word than "lay" to describe "just plain folks" in this case?)

cellio: (mandelbrot)
I awoke today to frost. Apparently the temperature got down into the upper 20s last night. I'm used to light-sweater season, as opposed to jacket season, lasting more than four days. Perhaps it will return. (In case you're wondering, the four seasons are T-shirt season, light-sweater season (also known as sweatshirt season), jacket season, and mega-jacket season. They are not of equal durations; T-shirt season usually lasts about 5-6 months.)

I found this rant about Usenet interesting. And not solely applicable to Usenet. Thanks to [livejournal.com profile] autographedcat for the link.

Template for a badly-written poll: "Does X change your opinion of Y?" Sure it can, but neither "yes" nor "no" actually tells you anything else useful. If what you mean is "does X make you less inclined toward Y?", say that. (A current instance of this is a CNN poll, where Y is Schwarzenegger and X is his comments about Hitler.)

We had a very good On the Mark practice Wednesday. Robert, Kathy, and I will be performing at Darkover (without Ray, who can't make it), so we've been juggling some things around to make them work with just three people. We've also added a couple new pieces that we can just plan for three from the start. Things are sounding good, and we've still got more than a month and a half to practice. Kathy's been taking voice lessons and that's paying off, too.

Jewish stuff, including some geeking )

cellio: (star)
Last night's service went really well. One other person and I split the service, and we had the cantorial intern and a separate torah reader. It's nice to be inclusive and give parts to more people, but there's something to be said for the person in charge (that is, me) being able to see and easily talk with everyone else involved. The congregation never knew about some of the cues and tweaks we were making, because we could do so discreetly. :-)

I got a lot of compliments, both on the service in general and on the d'var torah (sermon). I actually didn't think the d'var torah was all that great; there were a couple transitions that were kind of rough. It was a lot better than Tuesday's draft, though. And I think I struck the right balance; several people at the oneg told me that they are planning to come to the Tisha b'Av service next week, which will be a new experience for this congregation. I'm sorry I won't be able to be there.

The torah reader learned the portion (firat aliya of D'varim) in under two weeks, with trope. I am impressed.

The cantor complimented me on my singing, which was nice. (Also on my torah chanting last week.) I think she's getting more comfortable with the congregation, too. (She just started a few weeks ago.) I really like her; she's friendly, very easy to work with, and clueful.

Service division: I did kabbalat shabbat and kriat shema, the other person did t'filah and kriat torah, and I did the concluding prayers. This meant that I ended up with the kaddish list (names of people whose yahrzeits, or anniversaies of death, occured this week). So before the service I read the names out loud, which surprised some people. It seemed obvious to me: some people may come to services only to hear a relative's name on that list, and I at least want them to hear it without stumbling. And there were some weird spellings on the list, so I'm glad I did this. (There was also a dedication of a memorial plaque, which is a relatively infrequent occurence, so I asked the administrator to confirm that the family knew they weren't getting a rabbi this week. Again, it seems considerate to do so. They knew and were ok with that.)

After the service the administrator had lots of nice things to say, both about the job we did and about how it was a pleasure to work with me on this etc. I guess I'm one of the more organized folks among recent lay leaders. :-) I told her I enjoy doing this and would be delighted to help lead services in the future; we'll see if that goes anywhere. (She also said something about rabbinic school and I said "not now", which didn't really surprise her.)
cellio: (star)
I'm pleased with how Shabbat services went this week.

Friday night the worship committee led services. This involved a small herd of volunteers, with its attendant logistics hassles, but overall things went well. Notes for next time: (1) teach people how to use microphones effectively, (2) teach people about voice projection, and (3) make sure notations to stand up or sit down are written into leaders' copies of the service.

Our congregation reads one aliya's worth of the Torah portion on Friday nights. (This year we're doing the first aliya. After Simchat Torah we'll switch to the second, and then the third the following year, and so on for the seven-year cycle. Yes, there's a method to it. :-) ) This week's double portion was on the long side (28 verses total), so we had three readers. I got the long chunk, at 12 verses, though I wasn't trying to do that. The other two read; I chanted. I like chanting, and chanting rather than reading actually helps me with memorization and phrasing even if it takes longer to learn in the first place.

All of the torah readers did a great job. I had my part nailed, and I received many compliments -- including one person who told me I was giving the cantor a run for her money, another one who said I should just go to rabbinical school already, and a third who assumed I was a native speaker of Hebrew. Wow!

There were some logistics challenges, mostly due to the fact that not all of the participants are as familiar with the service as I am. The down-side of having an inclusive service where you call for volunteers is that you sometimes get people who aren't regulars and don't know, if not told, to tell people to rise for such-and-such prayer or whatever. Given the reality that many people who would like to participate are not going to start coming every week, I'd like to find some way to improve the overall level of knowledge among people likely to do this in the future (like members of my committee). Gotta figure out how to do that.

The rabbis will both be away next week too, so the cantorial intern and I had discussed just doing the service ourselves. (I didn't want to have a large logistics challenge two weeks in a row.) She said something about getting volunteers for next week within the hearing of many of last night's participants, though, so I have to change that plan slightly. One person (who is also quite knowledgable) asked to help, so my current plan is to have just the three of us do it and tell anyone else who contacts me that it's all taken care of. (Well, four of us; we have a guest Torah reader.)

I ended up leading this morning's service, because the person I had asked got stuck out of town and couldn't make it. All of last night's Torah readers are part of the morning minyan, so we repeated the Torah reading. (This is why I chose those particular people; I knew we'd need Torah readers twice, so why not get double use out of the learning effort?) This morning I tripped over the reading in a couple places, but there was nothing catastrophic. Aya helped lead parts of the service that I'm a little weak on, which was handy. I got lots of compliments this morning, too. There was one problem I'm not sure how to solve, though: the rabbi plays guitar for this service but I don't, so he's got an easy way to keep people together while singing, signal beginnings and ends of songs, and so on. I had some problems with this, but didn't want to start waving my hands like a choir director. Hmm.

All in all, I'm very happy with both services and I'm looking forward to doing more of next Friday's service. I have to write a sermon, which I'm not as excited about, but it'll be ok. (The rabbi asked me specifically to talk about Tisha b'Av. Hmm.)

cellio: (star)
I chanted the Torah portion for my rabbi today. It's in good shape (needs polish), and he pointed out a couple tricks to make some parts easier. What surprised me is that I was nervous while doing this -- enough that he noticed it in my breathing. I hope that problem disappears as I get the challenging bits nailed down more. I'd hate to sound nervous in front of the congregation.

(I was not nervous for the so-called "adult b'nei mitzvah" a few years ago. I was a little nervous the first time I chanted at Tree of Life but not the second. I don't think I was nervous when I chanted for the morning minyan the one time. And I was definitely nervous for the women's service a couple months ago, though the scroll calligraphy on that one was weird. So it's a mixed bag -- sometimes I am and sometimes I'm not, and it's not strongly tied to anything.)

In addition to this service (July 25, for any locals who care), I needed to find a couple people to help with the following week, because the rabbis will still be gone. I mentioned that I was having trouble finding someone to give the d'var torah (sermon, sort of), and he told me to do it myself and to talk about Tisha b'Av, which will be the following week. Ok, I can do that; I'd been trying to give the opportunity to someone else, but a lot of people seem to be intimidated by the idea. (Note for after the fall holidays: get someone to give a class or something in how to write a d'var torah.)

I was kind of surprised by the topic request, because while my rabbi personally observes Tisha b'Av and usually mentions it beforehand, the Reform movement in general doesn't observe this day and our congregation doesn't have special services for it. This year, he said, we're having services. It's a pity I'll be at Pennsic then; I'm kind of curious. Probably not curious enough to make the round trip, though.
cellio: (star)
I talked with my rabbi tonight and he said I should just go ahead and assign the parts for the service in a couple weeks, rather than giving him a list of names like we've done in the past. That makes things easier, but I hadn't known whether he wanted anyone else doing it.

I also talked with the new cantorial intern tonight. She seems really nice and easy to work with. She asked me to fill her in on how services work when there aren't any rabbis, and I did so. I told her she should pick whatever music she wants; I'm not going to try to dictate to her. We'll have a little huddle 20 minutes before the service to make sure everyone understands cues and it'll all be good. (I warned her that while I'm not new to the congregation like she is, I am new to being worship chair and she should let me know if she sees any problems.)

The rabbis will actually be gone for two Shabbats (that one and the next). The plan had been for the worship committee to lead one and the cantorial intern to lead the other. She told me tonight that she's a little uneasy about that, being new to the congregation and never having led a full service. I told her we have people who can lead a service cold (including myself) if need be and she should think about it and let me know what parts she wants to offload. We can decide this at close to the last minute, after she's had a chance to settle in a bit more. (I've already lined up a torah reader and am working on someone to give the d'var torah, so she doesn't have to do those.)

The torah portion is coming along well. I have one verse left to work out; I got to it (after working on this for a while) tonight, saw that it started with a trope symbol I don't know how to sing, and decided that this was as good a time as any to pause. I'll come at that fresh on Shabbat, when I plan to spend a lot of time working on this. But hey, I read the previous two verses without having to consult the trope book, so I'm definitely internalizing the more common symbols. I can currently chant about half of the portion from the unpointed text, and all but one verse of the rest from the pointed text (sometimes with hesitation). It's often flowing well. I think I'm in good shape for a service that's two weeks away. My rabbi will want to hear me chant it when I see him next week, and my goal is to have it nailed by then.

This morning's mini-class (after minyan) was on tevila, aka immersion in a mikvah (ritual bath). Read more... )

Shabbat

May. 17th, 2003 10:36 pm
cellio: (shira)
When Bill Watterson (Calvin and Hobbes) announced that he was retiring, reporters asked Scott Adams (Dilbert) for his reaction. Adams said: "As a fan, I'm distraught, but as a cartoonist looking at new vacant spaces in 2400 newspapers, well, behind me, my cats are dancing a conga line".

Shabbat report )

cellio: (star)
This Shabbat was very good in a number of ways.

Friday, featuring halacha of organ donation )

Saturday the 20s/30s group held an afternoon gathering -- a combination of study, socializing, getting to know each other, prayer, and singing. It was really nifty. (I was joking with the organizer Friday night about how I'm participating as much as I can with that group now, because in September I become inelligible. We joked about "happy 40th birthday -- now scram". :-) )

prayer, golden calves, and various discussions )

Thursday night at the board meeting the organizer asked me if I could lead havdalah, as both rabbis would have to leave before then. (It went something like this: "Do you know the havdalah service?" "Sure, I do it every week." "Great, could you do it for us this week?") Friday night she asked me if I could also lead bentching, the grace after meals (the afternoon included the customary third meal of Shabbat). Both of these went well (got compliments, even), and I learned that in the case of music, sometimes chutzpah can substitute for knowledge. Specifically, I had forgotten the melody to part of the bentching, so I just made something up on the fly and people sang along. I know they hadn't heard the melody before, because I hadn't heard the melody before either. :-)

Some of the people there weren't familiar with havdalah, so I ended up giving a little talk about the symbolism before we did it. So ok, I can stand up in front of a small group of sympathetic friends and lecture, but I'm still very uncomfortable teaching classes more formally. Weird.

The afternoon shared many elements with our morning minyan's annual Shabbaton (retreat for all of Shabbat, not just the afternoon). That's coming up again in May, and I'm really looking forward to it.

I realized this morning that this spring I'm chanting Torah twice, and neither is at my synagogue. I have to pester my rabbi again about getting a shot at that. (I'm chanting a little for that women's service I mentioned a few days ago, and I just got permission to chant my "birthday" portion on a Thursday at Tree of Life again this year. Last year I did the first two aliyot; my goal for this year is to be able to do all three. For this portion, the third is a little longer than the first two put together.)

cellio: (star)
Today was the last morning of the siddur pilot. They handed out evaluation forms and asked us to bring them back next week. The questions that the CCAR did, and didn't, ask gave me a little insight into their goals. More about the evaluation in a separate entry, later.

At Torah study we talked about the question: why do we need a rabbi to lead services? We don't, of course; any somewhat-educated person who meets the (straightforward) halachic requirements can lead. In most Orthodox and some Conservative congregations, in fact, the rabbi doesn't lead services -- other congregants do. But in the Reform movement, by and large, the rabbi leads, unless you're such a small congregation that you don't have a rabbi.

Aside: what do rabbis do? )

My theory (which I wasn't fast enough to articulate this morning) is that this is a product of our culture. People (Americans specifically? people in general?) tend to want access to the expert. We don't want to settle for the physician's assistant to treat our illness, even if that person is perfectly qualified because it's only the flu and the flu is a well-understood problem; we hold out for the doctor. We don't want the apprentice electrician even though it's only a light switch; we want the experienced one. We only consider the "lesser" positions if we can save money, for the most part. (Yes, of course I'm over-generalizing.) So I think it's the same with rabbis and services; people want the rabbi, who they know will do everything right, and not the qualified layman who has no credentials, even though it's only a regular Shabbat service and that person has seen this hundreds or thousands of times. I've already seen this with respect to music; the Reform congregations I'm familiar with want the professional singers, even if they're not Jewish, and not the ameteurs from within the congregation.

Why is this a more common attitude in Reform than in other movements? Two factors, I think: first, we're more assimilated into the surrounding culture and second, we're (overall) less educated.

Assimilation means, in this case, that we are more inclined to imitate what we see or hear about from other parts of Americana, like church services. That organ at services isn't a coincidence, after all. The Reform community is more outward-focused, while the Orthodox community is more inward-focused (or so it appears from the outside). We're more likely to have had diverse worship experiences, and the ideas rub off. (Remember that most Orthodox would not set food in a church at all, and some of them will not set foot in non-Orthodox Jewish services.) I'm not trying to say that they're shutting the world out; it's not nearly that active. But they will have fewer chance encounters, and therefore fewer opportunities to pick up foreign ideas about "how things are done". Combine this with the fact that most Reform Jews do not attend services regularly, and you get a community that's more in tune with the outside world than with its own traditions and history.

And then there's the education factor. In the Orthodox community, it is pretty much presumed -- correctly -- that almost any adult male present is capable of leading services. He's been davening daily for most of his life, after all, so he knows the drill and can probably read the Hebrew correctly. Maybe he doesn't have a good voice, but that's not so important. I see this dynamic in play in the morning minyan at the Conservative shul I frequent, by the way; at least half the regulars can step in to lead services if the regular guy isn't there. (By the way, I am not yet one of those people. I am in the bottom third of that group for liturgical skill. I have most of the knowledge, but am just not fast enough with the Hebrew yet. Ironically, I am in the top half or third for pronoucing the Hebrew correctly -- I'm just too slow.)

Most Orthodox and many Conservative Jews of my generation have had significant Jewish educations -- day school, or at least a daily after-school program, and maybe Yeshiva, and maybe something beyond that. They also attend services regularly, so the Hebrew component of that is reinforced on a regular basis. But there's more to it than just the Hebrew; they learn halacha, study Talmud, study Torah in some depth, and so on. Most of my traditional friends can quote relevant sources off the tops of their heads, and know how to look up most of the rest. And they're just regular people -- lawyers and accountants and programmers and shopkeepers, not rabbis.

Most Reform Jews of my generation have not had a similar education, and are not seeing that their children get that kind of education. They send their kids to Hebrew school, which meets after school one day a week and on Sunday mornings, until bar mitzvah. A smaller number continue on through high school. They are studying a broader range of topics (after all, the Reform movement's focus isn't on traditional halacha), and they are spending less time on it, so of course their knowledge isn't as deep. Hebrew is not a large part of it, judging from what I've heard when the various classes lead services; they just don't read well, for the most part. I'm not dissing the kids; they read better than I probably would have at that age, and some of them read better than I do now. But most of them do not read well, do not maintain the skill past the bar mitzvah, and are not going to emphasize it with their eventual kids.

So, all told, the average person at a Reform service probably isn't capable of leading it. (Some of those could if they had time to practice.) So if you suggest to the average Reform Jew that someone other than the rabbi can lead the service, his thinking will probably go something like this: "Well, I can't do it, and I'm pretty normal, so why should I assume that David there can? He hasn't had any more schooling than I have; he's just a regular guy. No, he'll probably screw something up. We should stick with the rabbi; he's an expert." And if they've never actually heard David lead services, how are they to know that he's actually capable of doing it?

So the Reform Jew who is qualified to lead services faces a real up-hill battle -- not necessarily with the rabbi or the administration, but rather with the congregation. And who wants to put up with that kind of grief? Speaking only for myself, why would I want to try to force myself onto people who apparently wouldn't want me? And who am I to go to the rabbi and say "please make a pitch and let me do this"? Unless the rabbi decides that you don't have to be a rabbi to lead services, thus drawing flack from people who will say he's shirking his job responsibilities, it's not going to happen. So at some level, it's all politics.

And that's why, in the Reform movement, you have to be a rabbi to lead services, most of the time. In my opinion, of course.

cellio: (shira)
When it rains, it pours. Friday mid-day I got a call from the rabbi at ToL asking if I was available to lead services that night (someone got sick, I think); I had to decline because I was -- for only the third time ever -- helping to lead Friday services at my own synagogue. Oops. :-) (I'll be at ToL in two weeks, so I didn't really miss out. I hope he was able to find someone.)

The service went ok. There were some imbalances in the distribution of parts, and the borrowed cantor (from another synagogue, and it was only her second time with us) ended up leading parts that I thought were going to be led by members of our committee. Oh well; it came off ok. I wish they had gone the extra step of letting our own members with the relevant skills fill the cantorial spots, but I guess that's touchy with some people. My part went fine, though I was confident that it would.

At the oneg the aforementioned cantor, without any provocation, complimented me on my Hebrew and then told me she was glad I was there with her during a couple of the sung parts. I'm not sure what the latter was about; she's a professional singer, so it's not that she needed my voice for support or anything. Maybe she just meant that she liked having the person singing next to her being on key. Or maybe she was just glad to have someone from the congregation (who knows the subtle musical clues) up there. Whatever; I can take a compliment without having to deconstruct it. :-)

I learned something interesting during this conversation: as part of the process for applying for admission to cantorial school, you have to correctly chant an unfamiliar Torah passage. I'm not sure how much time you get to prepare. Wow; I figured that would be a skill you'd have to demonstrate, oh, around the end of your first year, not before they even let you in the door.

(I'm not about to go to cantorial school, though I would like to learn trope. I have a book; I haven't gotten very far yet. I want to chant torah again, even if I learn the next one by rote and not because I fully understand the notation. I pinged my rabbi about this again last week; we'll see if it results in an assignment.)

I got to see Patti, one of our members who is now away at rabbinical school in Philly. They're on winter break, so she came back to Pittsburgh. I wish we'd had more time to talk. It's not clear how long she'll be in town; she's going to wing it, depending on weather.

cellio: (star)
It looks like I'm going to lead (part of) Shabbat services at my own congregation. Whee!

There's a Friday evening in December when both rabbis and the cantorial soloist will be unavailable (unavoidably -- this wasn't part of the original plan). So the worship committee, of which I'm a member (nominally co-chair) was just asked to lead the service. The rabbi wants five people, and I'll be one of them. (I'm assuming this breaks down as: kabbalat shabbat, barchu through shema++, amidah, Torah service, and concluding prayers, but I haven't actually been told that.)

I took the opportunity to point out to the committee chair that there are people on the worship committee with good voices and we do not need the services of one of the hired non-Jewish soloists if we pick the right people. We seem to be picking the right people (that is, she took all the off-the-top-of-my-head suggestions).

The deal with the soloists is this: on nights when we have our cantorial soloist we're fine; on other nights we have one of these hired soloists, most or all of whom are not Jewish. They used to do all of the cantor-led stuff, including the stuff that is only supposed to be led by Jews, which annoyed the heck out of me. In recent months the rabbi has been doing those parts himself, leaving the soloists with things like the opening and closing songs that anyone can do. I pointed this out to the chair and said "let's not back-slide". I really hope we don't.

misc

Jun. 28th, 2002 04:21 pm
cellio: (lilac)
I have a doc deadline today at work (SDK release). Some of my coworkers seem to think I should be frazzled. I've learned over the years how to plan for these things, so I'm right on schedule -- including some planned-in last-minute emergencies. :-) (That is, I allocated time to then-unknown tasks that I suspected someone would come up with.) I'm running what I think will be the final build now.

There are things I want to say about the pledge-of-allegiance thing, but I know I don't have time right now so it'll have to wait.

My new computer arrived last night. Yay! I haven't done much to it yet (took a while to get it to see the network, and that was an important first step), but after Shabbat I'll begin the frenzy of installing software and the like. I also saw my USB external hard drive just zip along, which is pleasant. (The drive is USB 2.0, backward-compatable to 1.0. My old computer was 1.0; this one is 2.0. The difference in data-transfer rate is 40 times. That is not a typo.)

Eventually, I want to partition the drive and put Linux on it (dual-boot). But the 10 minutes I spent last night reading Red Hat documentation were insufficient, so that'll wait. Partitioning the drive from the start would be easier, but it contains dire warnings about interactions with NT and I don't have time to figure them out right now. (The OS is Win2000, which is based on NT.)

I also got a delivery from the beer co-op this week. Looks like an interesting assortment. There are two beers in the mix that I don't personally like, but I have friends who do. (The beer co-op is a method of sampling lesser-known beers in a state that requires that you buy beer by the case.)

Ralph's D&D game was Wednesday night. It was fun as usual. I think we need to come up with a heuristic for communicating what is important and what's not without giving things away, though. We were about to embark on a journey that would take a week and a half to two weeks. We spent a while discussing travel arrangements, how much gear we were carrying, where supply points were along the way, etc. As a player, I expected encounters along the way and possibly even some "weather hazards" (it's getting on toward winter). Ralph had planned to get us to our destination that night, though, without encounters along the way. But he couldn't just say to the players "this doesn't matter", or that would have given this away. On the other hand, we could have saved half an hour of preparations.

Last night before getting the computer I went to services and ended up leading them. (The rest of the people there voted me most likely to succeed, or something.) I really wish the associate rabbi would call or something if he's not going to show up to lead, rather than leaving us to figure this out. This is the second time this has happened recently. (The senior rabbi is out of town; normally he does this one.) I almost didn't show up, but the store was open late enough that I could so I did. (I usually go.)

Speaking of leading services, I'll be doing that again next Friday at Tree of Life.

Sunday afternoon we are going up to Cooper's Lake to paint the Pennsic house, assuming it doesn't rain. We're just doing the exterior, so this shouldn't take that long. I don't have the carved bits for the interior done yet. (Actually, they're not even drawn yet.) I hope to make and apply those in July sometime. (The house is a re-creation of a building in Cordova around the year 950 CE. They did lots of decoratively-carved stucco. I can fake that. :-) )

I think my doc build is done now.

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