Sunday dinner, and reciprocation, and stuff

[cellio]

At Sunday dinner I made a comment that I fear might have come off wrong. We were talking about this group that Dani and I have dinner with sometimes, and how one participating couple hasn't been taking their turn when it comes around.

I don't keep a scorecard on these things; it was more of an observation than a complaint. I actually like to have people over for dinner (I think I'm a competent cook and I like to exercise that skill). I wish that we were doing more to reciprocate on the Sunday dinners, but I suspect that Ralph doesn't want to rotate the location. (Tell me if I'm wrong.) That leads to the need to find additional free nights, which can be a challenge.

I think the only reason the other case was noteworthy is that rotation is explicitly part of the ground rules of that group, unlike the more casual invitation of friends for a random dinner, or the more fixed "Ralph and Lori host Sundays" rule.

Comments

[ralphmelton.livejournal.com]

When the Sunday dinner tradition (okay, the Sunday dinner tradition I've been perpetuating) started back in 1995, It was a rotation between two houses. But then the other house dropped out, and I carried on the tradition by inviting new people.

I think it was semi-rotating in 1996--sometimes we'd have it at another house, but not as often as I hosted it.

At some point, it just became easier to maintain the tradition as a tradition of us always hosting dinner than as a rotating thing.

(And I note also that when we've been unable to host, you've stepped up to host, and that's fabulous. Thanks again for doing that.)

[cellio]

And I note also that when we've been unable to host, you've stepped up to host, and that's fabulous.

True, but it's pretty unbalanced. It feels more like filling in than true reciprocation. I'm happy to do it, of course; I just feel that we owe you a lot. If you ever decide you're sick of having us invade every single week, let me know. (Though I do recognize the motivation of being able to play with cool kitchen toys and/or new recipes, which just isn't as much fun when cooking for 2. So I realize that you get something fun out of this too. :-) )

[ralphmelton.livejournal.com]

The other big thing we get out of this tradition is a social life that works as a tradition.

This way, we get to see friends every week, without much hassle of coordinating schedules and activities.

It's definitely worth the hassle of cooking and the expense of buying groceries.

(If you want to play with cooking toys and show off cooking too, we can arrange pot-luck dinners or invite you to come early and cook with us.)

[cellio]

Ooh, that could work. (It doesn't necessarily require coming early, either, depending on what I want to cook.)

[indigodove.livejournal.com]

I don't keep a scorecard on these things; it was more of an observation than a complaint

This was obvious to me when the discussion happened. However, when I say something like that, I generally fear being misunderstood too...

In my opinion, you're welcome to come early, cook, or anything else you like :-)